Perhaps my favourite was in a discussion with a friend about time for planning, and I mentioned I had walked about 3km in the commute. “Bless your heart,” said my friend, “I have no idea what a kilometre is.”
After our Canadian/USAmerican giggles stopped, our discussion went into the variance of the word ‘bless.’ For we know that it can be colloquially used as a negative (even song lyrics suggest that blessing to be more of a curse), we both agreed that when we say (and hear) the word bless, we opt to presume the best.
Bless your heart to my friend is not a veiled insult, but rather an expression of care. When she uses it, she means that her heart wishes the best for the heart and soul of the person she’s talking with. I agreed, indicating that in my daily use, I have truncated it to ‘bless’ with the same intention.
Importantly, for us, such regular and repeated use of the word has not diminished nor dissipated the impact and intent. Rather, we say and hear it as an opportunity to consider how to bless and wish the best for the people we encounter.
So whether it is the security guard who asked my denomination before offering me a heartfelt “God bless you!” as I walked through the metal detector, or the woman in the coffee line ahead of me sarcastically speaking “well, bless his cheating self” into her cell phone - each gave me the chance to pause in prayer, and to ask God’s blessings.
For me, the privilege is to orient my mind and heart towards the positive, regardless of the intention of the speaker of the word. So bless my heart when I speak in kilometres, and bless the undercaffeinated who have been wronged, and bless the folks who lead prayers and those who sing God’s praise and those who merely think the word is verbal punctuation. Bless their hearts - for we receive a blessing when we choose to also bless.
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